My Thing.

"Every now and then, the stars align. Boy and girl meet by the great design. Could it be that you and me, are the lucky ones?" - Lucky Ones, Lana Del Rey

Ratna, Miranti, and I went for a very late supper few days ago. While we were waiting for their food to come (I hardly refused to eat but they decided that I HAVE to eat as well) ,we had a little chat about love, which frankly speaking, I had enough of, and I just figured out my thing.

Miranti and Ratna have the same way of "choosing" what kind of male they want to be their man, while I kind of.. the opposite way. I could say that they are picky, WHICH IS GOOD. I mean, we even try to put on the shoes that we like and try to walk on it, before we make a purchase. We double check the leather, the stitches, and the color etc, making sure they are perfect, so why wouldn't we be EXTRA picky about something so intimate and important like "choosing a lover"?

I have to admit that I have never been so picky as a woman, NOT EVEN ONCE. It's not that I want to be in a relationship SO BADLY, but it is more like me being so grateful that someone whom I love, loves me back. And I believe I have to be more picky about choosing someone to love from now on. lols.

I used to think that "why would a guy likes a girl like me? ME?? GAK ADA CEWEK LAIN APAH?". But hey, people have been telling me that I am pretty (by people i mean my parents, sister, and close friends. LOLS) and I always give my best, pretty much at every aspects in my life, so yeah, I think my thing is that I AM SO GOOD AT LOVING PEOPLE. *blushing*

Enough with the shitty thing called love, IM OUTTA HEREE.

Love, uh i mean, CHEERS!! :D

DW

BLACK JACK.

"Aku.. aku sekarang umur 21 loh"
"terus gueh harus bilang WOW sambil koprol gituh?"

Goodbye twenty, hello twenty first!!! 
Cheers to more awesomeness and wrinkles to come...!!!

I would like to thank God, for all His blessing and love. I want to be a person who's always be grateful, down to earth, kind, full of patience and love, forgiving, wise, mature, strong, and more importantly be that person who always fear GOD and obey His words.

I want to be that passionate young woman who give her 100% in everything she does in her life, I want to be a good graphic designer whose never tired of learning and growing, I want to be a successful business woman whose able to make her parents proud and repay all the kindness, love, and care that they have been giving her for the past twenty one years.. I want to be able to eat as much as I want and won't get fat at all, because my love for good foods is as big as the sun. ;p

I want to be the blessed one who inspires other people. I want to be a very good friend whose always there for all my best friends when they need me. And above all, I want to be a person with great strength in dealing with any kind of obstacles along my way and always have faith that things will be (eventually) okay! :) AMEN TO ALL THESE WORDS.

------

Tahun lalu mungkin adalah ultah TERBURUK, bahkan lebih buruk dari ultah Sweet Seventeen gue dimana gue baru pindah ke Singapore, jauh dari orang tua dan orang-orang yang gue sayang. Tahun lalu bahkan bokap gue sendiri enggak ngucapin ultah ke gue. Dan orang yang gue sayang kagak nyiapin apa-apa buat gue, sedangkan pas dia ultah gue ngumpulin gaji gue buat beliin dia jam tangan yang dia mau. Love sucks, huh? engga sih, Dia yang sucks.

Tapi ulang tahun gue yang tahun ini, probably was the BEST BIRTHDAY EVER!
I feel loved and it feels fuckin good to be loved!!! :D

Jadiii... di usia 21 ini, gue memang merasa gue lebih dewasa, lebih bisa nahan emosi, walaupun kemarin ini sempet melakukan hal-hal yang super bodoh!! hahahaha. Pas tanggal 3, dimana gue resmi bisa mabok-mabokan, gue kerja seperti biasa. Enggak ngeluh seperti tahun-tahun sebelumnya where I demanded a day off on my birthday. childish banget yah?? ITCCHHHHHH. *kibas rambut*

Pas jam 12 malemnya my lovely mom and my jelly surprised me with a lovely birthday cake while I was working on Monokrom's projects. Padahal sebelomnya mama gue bilang "Dew.. tahun ini mamah gak beliin kueh yahhh.. bosen gitu-gitu ajahhhhh."

MY WISH: semoga gue cepet kaya dan bisa banggain mamipapihhh :*

Terus sorenya gue naek taksi macet2 ke Kelapa Gading karena Didi bilang sama gue ada meeting sama client. To be honest sempet kepikiran sih, masa gue lagi ulang tahun gak ada apa-apa sama sekali, malah kerja. Tapi ya udah juga sih, taon depan juga ulang tahun lagi. HAHAHAHAHA.

LALU LALU... AKU... AKU DI SURPRISE-IN!

Ternyata Didi, Dodo, Ratna, Chenky, bersekongkol bikin gue nunggu di mol SEJEM, setelah gue macet-macetan kesanahhh. Bilangnya mereka kejebak macet, padahal udah di MKG juga. Mereka beliin gue Kue coklat super yummy di Manon dan belinn gue kado tas Zara yang cocok banget sama kepribadian gueh : PREMAN PETOJO. Terus, Antie sempet2in dateng padahal dia belomm fitt! Gue baru tau dia sakit maag akut D: GET WELL SOON ANTIE SAYANG :*

Thank you banget loh semuanyaaa!!! Buat Ratna, my sweet best friend, I love you full. I learn how to be a good person and good friend from you, na. Buat Antie yang udah bela2in datengg makasih sayang. Buat didi, dodo, chenky.. maacih udh suprisein akuhhh. Buat Dian si cadel lucuuu, terus Ivonne cantikss yang baru menjejakan kakinya di dunia profesional grafik desain *TSAAHHH* dan for the last but not least, Tiara! Si kecil yang innocent and super honest. Thank you guys, kalian bikin ulang tahun gue kali ini LEBIH BERARTI dari tahun2 sebelumnya. :D

Makasih juga buat NINA BURHAN! Veina sayang, Rika dan Lala yang kasih gue ban pinggang Zara yang sama persis kayak tas yang dikasih dari temen2 kuliah gue. hahahahahaha
Dan terima kasih buat semuanya yang udah wishing me a happy birthday. :)

KECUP BASAH SEMUAHNYA. MUACH. :* :* :*

HAPPY BDAY DEWI CANTIK. :D

I love being 21, single, and I have some goodnews that I will reveal soon.

GOD is GOOD!!!! 

Love,

DW

The Naked Truth

The truth is.. losing you has taught me so many things, it changed me to be the person I have always wanted to be. I am sorry that I wasn't good enough for you to stay and fight for the things and hopes we believed in. I am sorry that I wasn't able to be someone you expected me to be, I am terribly sorry.

The truth is.. I will always embracing our memories together, it brings the warmth back to my heart. I wish you happiness, prosperity, and all the goodness in life. And don't forget that baby you are one of a kind.  I wasn't ready to say goodbye but here I am, finding myself much much happier, stronger, more contained than ever when I was still with you. 

Lets live happily, but separately. 

To fall in love and to be broken hearted.

To forgive and to forget.

To remember and to let go.

To learn and to understand.

--

Oh enough the melodramatic SHITs.. LOLS. Do you miss me?? ahahaha

I cut my hair recently! I just came to the hair salon and was thinking "I'm cutting all these bitches off! "

And the funny thing is the hair dresser thought that I was a Japanese. and here's our conversation before he cut my hair.

HD : Kamu... Orang jepang yah??

ME :  Saya.. orang jakarta mas.

HD : ALHAMDULILAH YRA. *lega*

And here I am with my new hair do:

What do you think???? And here is me with the long long hair...

Which one do you think is better for me? I love my long hair but I HATE BLOW DRYING IT.

It took SO LONG for my long hair to dry. hahaha so I CUT IT OFF. muwahahahahaha

I love my new hair though! :)

"when there's a will, there's a way!"

Love,

DW

Chapter XXI : Happy Ending

This is the way you left me,
I'm not pretending.
No hope, no love, no glory,
No Happy Ending.
This is the way that we love,
Like it's forever.
Then live the rest of our life,
But not together.

Wake up in the morning, stumble on my life
Can't get no love without sacrifice
If anything should happen, I guess I wish you well
A little bit of heaven, but a little bit of hell

This is the hardest story that I've ever told
No hope, no love, no glory
Happy endings gone forever more
I feel as if I'm wasted
And I'm wastin' every day

2 o'clock in the morning, something's on my mind
Can't get no rest; keep walkin' around
If I pretend that nothin' ever went wrong, I can get to my sleep
I can think that we just carried on

This is the hardest story that I've ever told
No hope, no love, no glory
Happy endings gone forever more
I feel as if I'm wasted
And I'm wastin' every day.



****


Time to fuckin let go and let this pass behind me, so I can fucking move on. I thought it will be hard for me, but I was wrong. This 'goodbye' has even make me a better, happier human being. I'm better off without him and he is better off without me, I suppose. If it's meant to be, it's meant to be. What I know now is.. we were never meant to be together and I have to let him go.


When I wake up in the morning I do still hope all of these things are just a dream. But every time I wake up, things getting even more real.
so.. be good, my precious and I wish you well. :)


Love,


D.W

Chapter XX: Finding Neemo

I am not writing about Neemo the clown fish, I am writing about Neemo.. THE BUNNY! She is the newest member of my family and I am a proud mother (agak lebay sih tapi okelah yah) of a 4 months old American Fuzzy Lop bunny!!! :D

Actually I wanted to get a dog, but my mom would never let me get another one after we had to give up Mimi and Jasmine. She told me if i brought home a dog she swears she will kill it and cook it for dinner... LOLS. My mother's joke really scares me sometimes.. -_-

But then I read this blog post about Igloo, XX's Holand Lop bunny, I wanted to get a bunny as well. I did some research before I got Neemo on 17 March 2012, because I want to really take an excellent care for the bunny, I wanted to make sure that I REALLY want a bunny, not just a 'temporary craving'.

Can you imagine how fluffy she is?? :3 At first she was so shy but after few days she started showing that she loves her new place! She even did the binkies just days after I brought her home. Anyway, I am not sure yet whether Neemo is a she or he.. Because she is just 4 months old, basically you can tell the gender of a bunny when it turns to 6 months old and above. But the keeper at the pet shop where I got Neemo told me she is a female. Let's hope that Neemo won't grow any balls or a penis! I had enough troubles dealing with male mankind. LOLs. Even if Neemo were a boy, I would still love her as much as I do now.

Yes, I LOVE NEEMO!! >.< It's not even a full month since I have her in my life, but she brightens up my day with her stupid face and fat tummy. She loves food as much as I love food. I haven't weigh her though but from her butt, I can tell this cute bitch gained some weights. She loves to snooze under my bed, even now she is able to jump onto my bed! That's why I need to cover up my bed with huge plastic to keep my bed clean from her poo.

It is quite troublesome to take care of Neemo, but it is worth it with the joy she brings to my life :) She is so smart and she is potty-trained.. yeap, she takes a pee in her own litter box that I made for her. She stills pooo everywhere she wants but we will working on that. And she taught me to be patient because of her "shy-ness"; she needs more time to get used to my presence.

snoozing under my bed

As we know, a bunny doesn't make any sounds like cats or dogs do, that is why the keeper from the pet shop suggested me to let Neemo wears a collar with a little bells on it, so I could know where she is hiding at. That's why I bought a cute blue collar for her. Few days ago, I had this feeling to check on Neemo when it was only 4 o'clock in the morning.. and what I saw.. scared the hell out of me!

 I found Neemo strangled with her own collar! Her breathe was so heavy, it made sounds every time she inhales. I thought she was sick because I bathe her the day before.. :( I hold her in my chest and I brought her to my room, and I cried and I pray to God please don't take Neemo from me, I love her and I don't want to lose her! I finally realize she strangled herself with the collar..  I was terrified as much as Neemo were. -____________-

Sooo I don't think its a good idea to let your bunny wears a collar. Just to prevent such bad things happen. It was a good thing I decided to check on her, if I didn't.. I'd probably found her dead in the morning.

Neemo.. :) Please be a good bunny and stop poo-ing on my bed -__-. I love you, I swear I will take an excellence care of you, I won't hurt you and I want you in my life, period!! I clearly don't want to lose you anytime soon so stop eating the plastic and rummage the rubbish can okayyy.

P.S I am so in love with Neemo I even did a sketch of her when I was in a business meeting. :p DONT JUDGE OKAY I'M NOT A GOOD PAINTER.

Love ♥,

Neemo's Proud Mommy.

Chapter XVIII: Tentang Kamu dan Dia.

Lalu ada kamu. Ya, kamu.. yang hanya dengan senyum-mu, rasa cape dia hilang seketika. Kamu, yang pernah membuat hari-harinya lebih berwarna, memberikan dia satu lagi alasan untuk tersenyum, untuk merasa bahagia.

Dia cinta kamu apa adanya, bagi dia, kamu itu sempurna. Ya, dia sadar dia mudah marah, emosinya yang meledak-ledak.. Kalo lagi senang ya dia bener-bener senang dan dia pastikan kamu juga merasa apa yang dia rasa. Ketika dia lagi marah, satu-satunya yang dia inginkan adalah kamu memeluk tubuhnya yang penuh amarah dengan erat dan katakan padanya "Tenang sayang, semuanya akan baik-baik saja.." Walaupun otaknya yang penuh dengan ego dan emosi memberontak, dekapanmu yang nyaman itu akan membuat amarahnya reda.

Ketika dia terbangun dari tidur lelapnya, kamu adalah hal pertama yang ada dipikirannya, sama halnya dengan bagaimana kamu adalah hal terakhir yang ada di dalam pikirannya sebelum dia tertidur pulas. Sejuta angan-angan dan pertanyaan menari-nari di dalam pikirannya tentang dirimu, tentang kalian. 

Apakah kamu merasakan hal yang sama dengan dia?

Yang dia tau dia sudah memberikan yang terbaik untuk kamu, karena itu dia mengharapkan kamu untuk memberikan yang terbaik bagi dia. Dia selalu pastikan bahwa kamu sadar akan perasaan dia tentang kamu. Dia selalu berusaha untuk selalu ada, disaat kamu butuh dia. She put your happiness above hers. Tentu saja dia mengharapkan untuk kamu membalas semua usaha yang udah dia lakukan untuk kamu.
Tapi apa yang kamu lakukan?

Kamu pastikan egomu terjaga dan tidak akan ada orang yang bisa mengaturmu. Kamu mau dia untuk mengerti kamu dengan segala kegiatan yang menurut dia tidak begitu penting. Kamu taruh dia di urutan kesekian setelah kegiatan kampus, olahraga, pelajaran, dan teman-teman kamu yang membuat dia gak nyaman.

Ketika dia merasa terpojokan dan merasa tidak percaya diri karena celotehan teman-mu, kamu merasa tidak seharusnya dia merasa seperti itu, karena kamu tidak mencoba untuk mengerti dirinya, karena kamu.. tidak pernah mengenal dirinya.

Ketika amarahnya memuncak, kamu malah membiarkan amarahnya menyulut amarahmu.
Kamu membiarkan emosimu berlari bebas.. mengalahkan segala logika.

Karena itu dia berhenti mencoba. Bukannya dia menyerah, tapi dia tau, dia sudah melakukan apa saja untuk membuat hubungan kalian menjadi lebih baik, tapi kamu.. Kamu malah memberikan sejuta alasan tentang kenapa kamu tidak bisa memberikan yang terbaik untuknya.

Dia percaya, bahwa jika kamu benar-benar mau, maka tidak ada satu alasanpun yang mampu membuat kamu tidak bisa. Tetapi jika pada dasarnya kamu tidak mau, maka tidak ada satu alasanpun yang mampu membuat kamu bisa.

DW

P.S OKE LAH I KNOW this post 'sounds' so disgusting, but there is no need to give me a rude comment or do anything mean to me or push me to the ground, I AM already on the ground! :"(

Chapter XVI : Love is a Battlefield

Love is a battlefield, isn't it??
You have to fight for the ones you love.
Whether you fight to get their love or even to preserve their love.

I have failed to maintain a long-term relationship with my partner so many times before. Most off all were because we didn't have the same vision on how to express our love. We do have our own definition on how to let our loved ones know how we feel about them.. some show it with flowers, cards, chocolates, and other little sweet things. Some think that from being loyal and faithful is the only perfect way to show their feelings, no need flowers, gifts, and other shits.

But being too much carefree about little things that make your partner happy for the sake of being a principled person is just the same as being SELFISH.
Why? Because if you really love a person, you would do anything what it takes to make them happy; you put their happiness above yours, and that's what I called sacrifice.


Sac • ri • fice | noun | an act of a person surrendering a possession.

That is my ideal idea of love and how to preserve the love that I have.
You give your best to your partner. Don't you dare ask them to understand you when you don't even give the slightest effort to understand them.
Always make sure that he/she knows your feelings about them, make them feel loved.

Because when you stop showing your love, the love itself is fading away and it may permanently gone.


Broken hearted girl,

D.W

Chapter XI : Fakir Asmara

Kalo diperlakuin gak adil gini saya udah biasa. Salah satu diantara kita pasti ada yg lebih punya hati atau otak, kayaknya kamu gak punya dua-duanya deh. Saya setuju, kita gak usah berhubungan lagi, tapi satu, gak perlu ada kata maaf lagi.  -Rangga 

Gue belajar bahwa berharap dari orang yang lo sayangin adalah wajar dan ketika orang yang lo sayang enggak punya pemikiran yang sama dengan harapan yang lo kira adalah yang terbaik untuknya, rasanya.. kayak dijorokin ke got.

*lapingus*

Ketika lo udah memberikan segalanya, yang pasangan lo jelas2 minta dan dia gak minta tapi tetep lo lakuin karena lo tau itu akan bikin pasangan lo seneng, dibalas dengen perlakuan yang seolah2 lo itu pengganggu dan banyak nuntut, itu rasanya kayak dipeperin upil basah.

Dan apa pernah lo rasain, disaat lo tersadar bahwa lo gak bisa berharap terlalu banyak atau terlalu tinggi sama orang yang sangat lo sayang? Bukannya sah-sah aja ketika lo berharap pasangan lo memberikan at least apa yang udah lo kasih?

Ah.. kalo kata temen gue, apa bener semuanya cuma bualan cinta dan masa depan?
Dulu gue pernah bilang sama seseorang, kalo emang masih sama2 ada rasa cinta, semuanya masih worth it untuk dipertahankan.


Tapi setelah dipikir2 lagi, ketika modal kata 'cinta' aja udah enggak cukup, apa yang harus gue lakuin?
Apa mesti gue lari ke hutan.. belok ke pantai??

Ketika emosi mengalahkan logika, terbukti banyakan ruginya kan? - Cinta

XOXO,


D 

Happy Birthday, AR!

i love you, AR

Happy Birthday my dear :)
I wish all your dreams and hopes come true
I wish you all the goodness in life: health, prosperity, success both in your study and love life *wink*, and happiness.
You are my everything.
Be proud  of yourself baby boo, you are one of a kind.

xoxo,

D

Chapter II : you and me

Apparently, there is someone who is in a deep shit called love.. and that is me. hahaha *blushing*

I never thought that it will be turned out this way. It is funny how we went to the same high school but we never talked, not even a single "hi"

Okelah kalo begitu. segini aja yah. saya malu.

Je t'aime, AR.

♥♥♥

D